katHappy New Year! Wow, it is 2023! I can’t believe we made it to another year of life and another year of blogging! About an year ago I posted my first blog ever! I’m proud of all we’ve accomplished!
When I was younger, I always wondered what my future would look like. I thought about what I’d be like in my 20s. I wanted to be drastically different and look much older. Oh, little Kat…One thing I can assure you is you have definitely changed just not in ways you expected to. Did you guys feel this way too? Well, look how you’ve grown and how time flies!
2022 was quite a year. Few of us look to 2023 with hope, especially when we listen to news that forecasts a recession coming soon, new COVID surges, and all kinds of doom and gloom. I, however, refuse to look to 2023 with hopelessness, not because I am an unwavering optimist, but because I know 2023 will be better. I will have a better year than the last. With God by my side, I’m only reaching higher and higher heights every year of my life, even if there are difficulties that I know will unfold in 2023.
Regardless, 2023 will be a great year, and that’s a fact! Let’s all have that mentality, then undoubtedly 2023 will be beautiful.
Now we’ve all heard this phrase at least once, “New Year, New Me,” because no one, and I mean NO ONE can avoid the waves of social media posts that encourage us to set new goals and habits. It’s the beginning of the year, and everyone’s looking to change and improve their life somehow! Our desire for improvement is like one of those profoundly ingrained biological things we can’t get rid of (I’m sure there’s science behind it, but I’ll leave that to you to figure out. I’ve lived enough years to know it’s true, lol.)
There are two kinds of people: 1.) Those who gleefully buy a new planner every year or actively sit down and write their goals and create elaborate vision boards (I’m one of these) 2.) and those who don’t.
Number 2 is a weird phenomenon. How can I sit here and tell you self-improvement is an innate human desire while there are actual people who refuse to set goals at the beginning of the year? Well, some people don’t want to fall into social pressure, so they don’t do it-it’s like an act of resistance or something. Then, some people don’t write their goals down but subconsciously (and quite stubbornly) create plans and start working towards them anyway. Then, some people have a hard time and need more motivation.
But hard times don’t last forever, so eventually, at some point in their lives, they jolt up one day and decide they are tired of wasting their time on this precious earth and their one life. I promise you, each of these kinds of people has set goals at least once in their lives. The disappointment caused by their unfulfilled goals discourages people from continuing to develop them. It’s like a dream. Why would you chase it if you never seem to get closer to fulfilling it? Some people are more persevering than others, but you build perseverance over time by challenging yourself. It’s totally something you can develop within yourself.
Which type of person are you? Well, it doesn’t matter cause I’m here to tell you the best way to set new year goals and the best way to manage your expectations and kick disappointment in the stinking face! Yeah! Setting goals at the beginning of the year is reasonable, period. Managing your time and expectations and reaching your goals well that’s hard.
But before I share my tips, let’s talk about goals. Let me offer you a fresh perspective. I believe goals are equivalent to promises, and let me tell you why. When you make goals, you promise to put in as much dedication and devotion as possible to fulfill them. When you make a promise, you don’t want to break it, or you’ll lose credibility with others and yourself. Making promises helps you fulfill things. Promises motivate you to complete them. If you don’t make promises, there’s no accountability, so you’ll never do anything and never get anything done.
Here are my 7 tips for setting and reaching your new year’s goals without going beyond your limitations:
1. Don’t overdo it
- Don’t exceed your limitations. Often our hearts and thoughts go beyond what our physical body can do. Yes, push yourself beyond the limit, but don’t exceed your limits to the point you feel terrible or cause yourself to abandon your goal entirely.
2. Change the method
- My mother always told me that if one way doesn’t work, try another! Try different methods until you can do it, it sticks, and you’re satisfied!
3. Be open to the unexpected
- Life is full of unexpected moments, so you must be flexible and willing to change your original plan. Adapt to new environments, techniques, and accept things not going your way with grace. It might be more of a blessing than you think.
4. Create realistic goals
- For example, if you want to stop eating chocolate every day, I recommend cutting it off slowly. Set a goal to eat chocolate only 3 times a week- or whatever seems reasonable! Don’t set an overly demanding or impossible goal.
- Look up how to set SMART goals. You may have heard of this in school.
5. Track the progress of your goals with grace and flexibility
- Meaning don’t try to stick to your plans to a tea, don’t be overly strict.
- It’s ok if you mess up.
- Don’t be overly obsessed with achieving your goal to the point you’re insensitive to your own or other people’s needs; instead, go back to your purpose. Why did you want to fulfill that goal in the first place? Ask yourself if there’s a better, more realistic, more understanding way to accomplish it. Or if it’s even worth completing it in the way you imagined. You may need to change your goal if it’s not working out.
6. Use your time wisely
- Time is precious, so use it wisely. Use a planner/calendar to schedule your day hour by hour (trust me, you’ll be much more efficient this way-but, of course, always be flexible!) Try to keep to your schedule as much as possible and develop consistent habits.
- Set alarms and reminders on your phone.
- Think of each day as a step. Today is step 8 of out 365. Let’s keep moving forward and live each day without regret.
7. Engage in Healthy Comparison
- Don’t compare yourself to anyone but your past self. Don’t judge yourself at all because that just leads to shame, insecurity, and a negative inner dialogue. Treat yourself like you would treat someone you really love. Instead, engage in healthy comparison.
- Healthy comparison is when you acknowledge that other people may be doing “better” or “more” than you. Still, instead of feeling envious, you use that as fuel to improve yourself. For example, if one of your friends is ripped and you want to be ripped, instead of feeling envious or inadequate-ask that person for advice. Fully acknowledge that they can lift more than you, but believe you can get there too! There may be reasons unknown to you as to why they’re more ripped to you. Maybe they have some advantages you don’t; you can learn what those advantages are and shift your lifestyle to get to their level too. Remember you are a unique being and you can’t be like anybody else and why would you? Realize your worth and how wonderful and beautiful you are.
“We all make mistakes; they’re all stepping stones to take us where we wanna go. It’s never straight, no.”- Song: ‘Edge of Great’ from Julie and the Phantoms (lol)
Some people see a rock as a stumbling rock and trip over it, and others see it as a stepping stone. These are not my words, but I heard something like this the other day at my church, it’s reminiscent of Jesus’ words about the corner stone (Matt 21:42-44).
My pastor recently said something quite piercing but motivating, “If you fail to do it until the end, you will regret it forever.”
Let’s not live in regret but challenge ourselves this year; let’s not be ignorant or envious, and let’s not put ourselves down for our lacking and our mistakes. Instead, let’s try again and encourage each other. Let’s be fruitful in love because we can do all things through love. We can do everything through Christ who strengthens us (Philippians 4:11-13).
Now go have fun writing your goals! Create a note on your phone, make that vision board! I made one and it only took me an hour (check out my insta @thiscounterpartlife to see it). Post your goals somewhere you can see them everyday. But don’t let your goals remain on your phone, in your dreams, or on a vision board. Bring them to life by taking action! May the love and power of God and Jesus Christ be your great strength, your wings to soar and fly!
Love, Kat <3
